Today I watched this great video about anger and how to release it - watch this video by Ben Angel.
He talks about how he screamed into this pillow and what a HUGE releif it was for him to finally LET GO of all of that stuffed down pain and sadness.
I loved seeing an important entrepreneur (and a man) sharing this story publicly.
You see, somewhere along the line you were told that there are "good and bad" emotions. Anger is a "bad" emotion and joy is a "good" emotion. But that's a myth - emotion is not good or bad - its just feeling. It just is.
But because we were told by parents, teachers, community, bosses...that we must "control our emotions", "hide our emotions", "not be emotional", we end up stuffing down all of our shit...
And then we wonder why we can't stop feeling anxious, depressed or worried!
So where does all that emotion go?
Well...it gets buried deep in your subconscious and when you get triggered by something in your life - BAM! A tidal wave of feeling bursts out.
And it's normally not pretty. It's shows up as blaming, hurtful words, hiding...and sometimes it comes out on other people.
So you start to tell yourself - "SEE! Emotions really ARE bad! They are unruly and dangerous and hurt other people".
But that's not true.
Emotions aren't the problem - it's bottling the emotions that is the problem. But if you allow yourself to consistently and regularly express emotions you avoid these wild rides and their unwelcome outcomes.
The importance of this is massive.
As I learned from my friend and teacher Marisa Peer - "tears that are not expressed will cause other organs to weep". Repressed emotions do more than screw up relationships and sabotage your success. They also create sickness, pain, and disease.
For example, anxiety related illnesses account for over $40 billion of medical expenses in the US each year...that is $40 billion dollars and hundreds of thousands of hours all stemming from emotions like sadness, fear and anger.
You don't want to be part of that situation, I know.
My clients use Rapid Transformational Coaching as a safe space to feel emotions (of all types) and are able to release their emotional pain both at the conscious and subconscious levels. I see how it changes their lives to finally allow themselves to cry or yell. It's like a weight is instantly removed from their shoulders.
So here's my invitation to you....
Instead of pushing emotions down, bottling them up and hiding them away in the attic - create practices to feel. Like the pillow punch that Ben talks about...or something my husband and I do is called "Screaming at the trees" where we go into the woods and scream. Or maybe you have to dance or listen to music and cry...
You are an emotional person - WE ALL ARE.
Let's get real and feel together, shall we?